I told myself you were right for me

This week I let myself get caught in a spin and it was only until a friend said to take stock that I stopped and took pause.

I had gotten caught up in a moment, a moment that in my mind unravelled into the full storybook.

For the first time in years (?) I had two men on my plate and as far as I was concerned one had to go (too young and unavailable) in order to achieve my desired life result (husband, kids - family) with the other.

As my friend was up to speed with all of this - by way of phone, text and email updates from me - by day five she dug her heels in and said it had to stop. No friend of hers was going to be doing all the chasing.

And so it did - stopped. I took pause and let myself breathe. I questioned my motive, my actions - why I was pushing so hard. I had been trying to escape my own daily drudgery, defy logic and fast-forward to a result that was never there in the first place.

It's a skill I've certainly had to learn - knowing when to stop and let something go - and this time around, it happened on an axis - the axis of my friend telling me the balance wasn't right. And like all good friends are prone to do, she told me I was better than that.

So I took pause and considered. With that logic entered and I let it go. I stopped hounding. And it felt good.