Web of lies in Hampi

In a Holy place, once upon a time where two kings ruled, I found myself becoming embroiled in a right royal mess.

It had started off innocently enough, as these things often do, when I made the decision in Goa to be married. I’d read in my research that a marital status was an effective deterrent for unwanted and persistent advances from Indian men. 

Thus in the enigmatic and enchanting town of Hampi, I transferred my diamond dress ring from my right hand to my ring finger.  

As I was checking into the Hampi guest house, the local boys were quick to acquaint themselves.

Ganesh was a striking 25 year old who had fabulous cheekbones, a toned torso and slim hips.  He had a penchant for Bollywood films and I told him with looks like his he could be a film star.

He seemed quite pleased with himself and told me a French woman he’d met at the guest house said he could model in Paris.  Despite lacking height at around 5’8 Ganesh had that feline 'Avatar' look about him – a physical reference he drew himself.

Suffice to say, Ganesh knew he was hot stuff, but he spoke fluent English (not something I’ve found easily among the Indian people) and was funny and alluring.

The first night I arrived he took me on a ‘test drive’ on his Royal Enfield, otherwise known as the 'Bullet'.  

The Bullet is the crème de la crème of motorbikes in India and according to Lonely Planet, the envy of all Indian men who don't own one.

We zoomed around Hampi on Ganesh's Bullet and he took me to the lake to see the full moon and stars.  He showed me snippets of Bollywood films on his iPhone and video clips of a recent camping trip away with friends – including two Western women who were dating Indian men (one of whom is married to Rami – the guest house owner and Ganesh’s cousin).

Ganesh was trying it on with me and I was impressed by his persistence.  Down by the lake he planted the seed of seduction and it didn't take long for that seed to sprout full bloom.  

Our romantic shenanigans were being carried out in the utmost of secrecy. I was married and did not want the guest house staff (nor the Western travellers I had befriended who were the innocent victims in all this) to think I was committing adultery.

The secrecy worked in Ganesh’s favour – it opened him up to play others. 

“Single and ready to mingle,” he said.

Before long, Ganesh’s relationship history was revealed.  He had dated many Western women, lost his virginity to an older Canadian woman (he was 16 or 19? and she was 25) and he had an Australian girlfriend of some three years who had helped him pay for the Bullet (apparently they cost around $1200).

There was also Sian, a 20 something English rose who had come to India for yoga teacher training after a bad breakup in Cardiff.

During her time in Goa, Sian had met Lee, a pretty blonde from Canada and together they had travelled to Hampi where they had met Ganesh (and Lee’s now boyfriend of a month Pradeep).

When I met Sian she was clearly healing, still licking her wounds from the hurts of a cheating boyfriend she had been in a relationship with for more than four years.

But she was also intimate with Ganesh - a fact she kept from me until my last night in Hampi.

It was smoke and mirrors at the guest house and lies were circling. 

But truths were also being unravelled leading to inevitable disappointments and betrayal. 

It took for Greg, a Canadian eccentric, to amble across my path and jolt me back to reality.  This towering figure had rallied me up on my last day in Hampi  appearing out of nowhere to chat at one of the ancient temples.

I mentioned the Indian men and Western women getting together back at the guest house and Greg said these unions were common in India – he’d written an article about it.

“Western women travellers want a brown boyfriend in India, a black boyfriend in Africa, a yellow one in Thailand and the ultimate prize is to bag a Buddhist monk,” he said.

Little did he know I was the cliché.

While Greg was a little offbeat and candor, he made up for it in local insight and I was happy to pass over his idiosyncrasies in favour of his wisdoms. 

Having said all this I had already been warned about the Indian men from a friend I had dinner with in Melbourne before I came to India. 

My friend Sarah told me to watch out for it.  She had met an Indian man in the North, become romantically involved with him and they had spent time travelling together.  Once back in Australia, Sarah received an email from her Indian lover requesting money.

Ganesh had already been working me for money.  He said his family was poor but he had won a scholarship to study veterinary science at Melbourne University and wanted to go.  However on our second day on the Bullet, Ganesh told me he was feeling sad.  He had learned a considerable sum of money was needed for an ‘entrance fee’ to uni and his father – a lowly fisherman – could not afford it. 

Ganesh’s (false) intention was to study abroad and return to Hampi to set up an animal clinic.

But thanks to Sarah’s tale I was already onto the scam.

“I know what you’re doing Ganesh and I’m not paying for your university studies,” I blurted out.

While it didn’t necessarily feel good to put my foot down, it had to be done, and fortunately the force of my response helped silence anymore talk of study or animal clinics.

My time in Hampi was dishonest but it was also fun.

The place is completely bewitching with its sites cast in so much history and religious significance.

It does not surprise me I fell spellbound here in more ways than one. 

Ironically I also believe being married saved me from really tripping myself up.  

Towards the end of my three days in Hampi, Ganesh had backed off and was spending more time with Sian. He knew she was going to be the better bet.  And I couldn’t play any other card as I wore the protective guise of being married.

Ridiculously my last night in Hampi was sleepless as I lay in bed knowing Ganesh was spending the night with Sian (although they had been discreet about it).

Had I been truthful about my single status things could have turned out differently. 

I have a hunch Ganesh would have travelled further with me too (like Sarah with her Indian beau) and I suspect I would have fallen (the long held, ingrained pattern of adoring unavailable, beautiful men).

But as it were, I dodged that Bullet. 

And I hope Sian will be ok.  

She and I exchanged email addresses, her asking: “Are you on facebook?” but sadly I won’t be able to befriend her as she'll only learn I didn't tell her the truth.

It’s also not my business as to how those two will turn out.  I've 'let go' and am leaving the rest up to them.

As my wise friends have said to me before – sometimes a person has to figure it out for themselves.

Photo: Ganesh 

The son of Shiva and Parvati, Ganesha has an elephantine countenance with a curved trunk and big ears, and a huge pot-bellied body of a human being. He is the Lord of success and destroyer of evils and obstacles. He is also worshipped as the god of education, knowledge, wisdom and wealth.