Ready made families

I've read that where we are in life is where we have chosen to be.

I've also subscribed to the words from the poem "Desiderata" by Max Ehrman ever since they came to my attention when a trader cited them in his weekly newsletter after the stock market crashed in 2007 (and my share portfolio with it).

"You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should."

I've also taken solace in: "you never forget the ones you've loved" from the French film, Apres Vous, when missing the boys I've said goodbye.

When the chips are down, it's in these trinkets of wisdom that I'll often lean.

And then there's children.

I would love to be a mother and often beat myself up about not having children. But in reverting to my opening line, it has had to have been my choice.

My maternal instinct is there - the relationship is not.

The answer? Play surrogate.

Two friends of mine, both mothers with three, are employing me as their babysitter.

It has brought a whole new lease of life! I role play mum, and my friends take their breather. Win win.

I'm practicing motherhood.

I've been a pet owner for 16 years - ask any committed pet owner, they will confirm, the pet is our fur child.

But there's something to be said for being a part of your friend's family. You love your friends, you (usually) love their kids. And when six year old Willy says: "I love you Cazi", it makes me melt.