You can't always get what you want

On the first day of spring where there should be a spring in my step, I've fallen flat.

As readers of this blog are aware (and newbies about to find out) today I had my appointment with a fertility specialist to chat about egg freezing.

I was all gung ho (re-reading my former post I note this sentiment) about taking action to ensure I had my reservation at the baby making table.

Today's appointment was a real eye opener. I didn't spend too long with the specialist because as soon as she quoted the costs ($12 - $13k minimum) for the process, I tuned out making my mind up then and there that if children weren't in my future the natural way - as a current single woman, I wasn't going to test run the science.

Apparently one needs about two rounds of 'egg collection' (across two cycles) to maximise their chances of producing an egg right for fertility. Of course I would have to pump hormones into myself to get more eggs created than usual and for the process to 'harvest' them I would have to go under a general anaesthetic (that part of which I knew). And once the eggs are frozen - it's about an extra $1500 to inseminate with the male's sperm.

This was all getting a bit much.

I could go further into the ins and outs but for want of not getting too technical or tedious - the upshot is this: I'd be looking at about $30K outspend to have a baby from frozen eggs.

Which had me sitting across from the doctor thinking; do I want a kid that badly? And today without a partner in the picture, my gut says no.

In anycase - on the first day of spring, when the sun is shining and nature is set to bloom - my rosy cheeks have paled. Even if I had the money I don't think I would do it.

It just seems too hard.